kaun suthri dhaal rahve hai

एक बै एक jaat अर बानिया early morning जंगल (t *t **) हो के जोहड़ मैं हाथ धोन लागे, अर दोनुआ की आपस मै नज़र मिल गी . Jaat ने सोचा अक बनिए तै पहलां भी के उठेगा, इन बानिया नै पहला घने बदनाम कर राखे सां अक Jaat जूट इसे surde (dirty ) होया करें

परली ओड़ नै बानिये नै भी न्यू सोचा अक जाट तै पैलां भी के उठेगा . दोनुआ की prestige बन गी अर दोनु करड़ी ढ़ाल जंगल के हाथ छपाके मार मार के धोन लागे अर कोइसा उठे इ नही

थोड़ी हान मै बानिये ki gharwaali aapne chhore nai बोली (typical baniya accent main) "अड़ मखा परकाशे tere chacha ne dekh ke ल्यायिये , ke उक -चुक hogi. Baaniye ka chhora jhohad par gaya अर देख तमाशा अर bolya " अड़ baabu ke baat hogi, itni वार la di". Baaniya bolya chhore नै " अड़ bhai मूरख tai paala pad rahya सै, dekh घरा jaa अर dukaan khol ले /agarbatti la de अर aapne गाहका (customers) ne आछी ढ़ाल niptaa diye अर मेरा nahi बेरा कूड बार (कितना टाइम) ho ja"

Nyun Jat ke ghar aali aapne ghara chhore ne boli " re bharthu tera babu nahi aaya , ek bai dekh ke aayiye". Barthu bi jelwa le ke johad pe pohchn liya ar babu ne dekh ke puchha babu yu ke. Jat thadu ho ke bolya " ak bhai ghara ja ke mhaisan(BHAINS) ki dhar kad liye ar rundi ne aggai ki karan khatar gaam main jhota dekh liye ar gaam main jhota na milye to gawand mein jhota dekh liye ar aapni nai achhi dhal aggai(conceive ), ar jab byave(delivery) to achhi dhal khur chunt diye ar bahi mera nahi bera kad ulta gharan ayun.

Jat ke nyun kahnde Baaniye said de si nai khada hoya ar bolya" ad makha dekho yu jat ka jat 10-10 mahina ki sharat nibha karai sai ke"

Jat said with pride " na ajya khoya tain nahi ghisa dyunga"

jaat in pakistan

ek jaat pakistan m tha ...t uska babu expire hogya .....wo srpanch k pass gya ..orr bola
aak srpanch sahab mera babu mrr gya ...uskoo daag deni hai...srpanch muslman tha ..wo bola eek bhai
yo muslmano ka gaam hai bhai ...aade t tera babu dfnaya hi jaga....bhai jaat n man li us time
pressure m aakker.....to jaat ka babu dfnadiya gya.. per jaat n chyn nahi mila ktti ...
usne socha nu t yaar ..babu ki aatma n kati shanti nahi milegi...kuch t krna pdega...
jaat n aapne babu ki kbrr khodhi ..usko nikal kkk..kisse orr ki kbrr m gaad de hai ..
fer jaat thodi raat si n srpanch dhore gya orr bola...sarpanch sahab ..meri gher ki orr ..
tractor ki taali mere babu ki jeb m rh gyi hai......ek b kbrr khudhwa do mere babu ki....ttt
wo muslman sarpanch ,jaat orr do tin aadmi gye ..orr..kbrr khodhi
......jaat ka babu gayab ..sarpanch bola ...rrr kit gya chaudhry sahb.....jaat bola ..sarpanch
sahab mere babu ki ..sanjh nnn...ghumn ki aadat thi ...chal gya hoga kisse..orr kbrr m...
ek aadhi orr khodh kk dekh lo.....sarpanch bola rr nu kukar jaga yaar..jaat bola ..nua tha mera babu
..sarpanch n kai kbbrr khudwayi...aakhirr m uska babu ..srpanch ki bhu ki kbrr m paya ...sarpanch
n dekha orr bola rrr yo aade meri bhhu ki kbrr mmmm..... fer nu bola rrr dekho kk ho funkh do isne tha kk
..na tt kisi orr n dukhi krrega roj sanjh nn

desi ghee special!!!!!!!!

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ek bah bhai ek tau apni chhori tahi chhora dekhan chal padya.....bujhte bujhte pahoch gaya ek gaom me...aur ek poli main ja kah bujhya..ek bhai koi chhora bataya haad...tah chhore ka babu hoka bhar laya...dhodh ghaal diya tau tahi...tau ne piya dhoodh aur bolya bhai...chhora kit sah.....tah chhore ka babu bolya ek apne kamre me hain...tau bola thik hain main dekh aau hu ja kah uske kamre me.....
tau chala gaya bhai....bhitar jakah dekha tau nah... chhora jama patla sa....halah jab aisa lagah ek bakri si jugalah hain...aur bhai kamre me angregi gane la rahaya....aur kamar ka patrahal sa uttar raha.....bahut kamjor chhora...mote mote chasme laga rahya...tau ne dekha aur pher ulta chala gaya chhore ke babu dhor.....chhore ka babu bolya...ji baat to thik hain..par aap ye batao ki ladke ko dahej me kaya doge....tau ne thodi haan tah sochha...aur pher chhut tahye bola.....bhai 8-10 kilo ghee de denge aur aagah phagan si main eski aankh banwa denge..!!!!

police competetion

Ek baar saare world ki police ka competetion ho rha thaa,india se haryana police ka jawan chala gaya.jo bhi event ho sab barabar rahe last mein bole bhai logo sab ko ek sher(tiger pakad kar lana hein.koi 1 ghante mein to koi 4 ghante mein sab countries ki police wale sher pakad kar le aye.india wala nahi aya to sab bole bhai usko dhund lete hein kahin sher ne use maar naa diya ho.jab sab police wale jungle mein gaye to dekha ke jat sahab ne ek bhalu ko ulta taang rakha hein aur usko de lath bol saale tu sher hein.

Tau got a wrong call

Tau ke ghar main nya nya fon lagya tha. gam ke choran ne tau ko bhot samjhaya ke dhyan se bat kriyo, gam ki ijat ka swal se.ek din fon agya. tau ne uthaya. tau bolya "hello",dusri side se awaj aaye " kon bol raha se ?', tau bolya "Randoo",phir awaj aayye "kahan se bol rahe so ?" Tau ko gam gam ki ijjat wali bat yad aagee or bolya " Bhai mehare gam men to sab log munh (mouth) te eh bolen sen,tham batao kahan se bolo so"

Tau ki Taang ka Operation

AAK bar TAU taang ke OPERATION ke liye TAI ko lekar Delhi gaya.
wha hospital me lift se tau ne 1 nojwan- suthari- nurse ko dekha.
AUR tai se kaha ja lift me jaakar tu isi nurse jasi nyi sudhari bankar aaja.
taang ke illaj ka intjar kar lunga.
Tai upper lift me chali gyi-
thodi-der me 1 sardar lift se utra aur tau uske piche ho liya- bola Raju ki ma yo ke kryaa
Sardara bola - BHAI sahib tusi mainu kuch kaha
Tau Bola- abhi mai tera bhai sahab ho gaya.
Raju ki ma shakal badlane se ristay nahi badaltey. Tere wahi nan- nakas- Hathi si masat chal-GAJ GAMINI nyu ke mai bhulu su.
Itna sun kar sardar bhag liya- piche piche tau bhi.
Bola feroon ke 7 bachan- aur janam janam ka sath bhi bhul gyi- 1 taang toot rahi hai pher bhi bhaajne
mai bhi nahi jaan duga.
Sardar jangle chadh gya-& 1 colony me ghus gaya. Tau bola Bhaio meri madad karo---
Raju ki maa dhokha karke bhaag gyi---------

GUUUUUUULLLKKKND sssai k?????

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ek bai ek HAKLA manas..paan ki dukaan pe jaa kai puchhan lagya..B B BBB BHAI SSSHHAB GUUUUUUULLLKKKND (GULKAND) sssai k?????
dukaandar bolya..SAI TO SAHI PR ITNA GAADDHA NA SAI JITNA TU MANGAI SAI........


To Read more Haryanvi Jokes, Keep visiting www.bestharyanvijokes.blogspot.com

chalak moti

Ek baar ek kuta(DOG) bhaja ja thaa . uske sathi bole re moti ke baat se, kyun bhaj ra se. moti kuch na bola aur bhi tej bhaj liya. uske saathiyan ne sochi bhai koi gambhir mamla se . to ve bhi uske pache bhaj liya . ve saare unne rokne ki kehe per wo to kati top gear mein chhoot ra thaa.kafi door ja ke moti rook ga aur bhai ek khambe ke uper tang thaa di. aram te kaam kar ke bola bhai logo maine kal dekha thaa bijli wale is khambe ne gadan laag re thee to maine socha kade koi mere te pelha bazzi na maar de , ja tahi bhaj ra thaa.


To Read more Haryanvi Jokes, Keep visiting www.bestharyanvijokes.blogspot.com

molad

ek bai school main master ne baalkaan tain poochya-essa jaanwar ka naam batao jo chun -chun ke ped pe chadhda ho.
ek molad naam ka chorra bolya-jee bhains.
master ne sunke kahyaa-dhanya ho tera guru.
to molad bolya-ismain guru ke karega yaaran ke paas dimaag e itna sai...


To Read more Haryanvi Jokes, Keep visiting www.bestharyanvijokes.blogspot.com

chutkula

ek be gaam me ek aadmi ek gadhe ki taang baandhe tha. udde ke ek police aala aa gya.
wo majaak ke mood me bolya," arre aapne bhai ki taang kyun baandhe se."
wo aadmi bolya," main nyun baandhun soon, kade yo bhi police me bharti ho jya."

To Read more Haryanvi Jokes, Keep visiting www.bestharyanvijokes.blogspot.com

post your jokes

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